chicago, fear, freaking out, lessons, men, moods, reflections, relationships

on the things I don’t want to admit

I've spent much of the past 12 hours trying to sleep/sleeping fitfully/having bad dreams or crying/holding back tears. The remainder has consisted of trying to pretend I'm strong when I'm falling apart inside; attempting to convince myself that my life hasn't been a complete waste of effort; and arguing with airline employees that I deserve… Continue reading on the things I don’t want to admit

Death, grieving, Jack, love, memories, reflections, relationships, transformations

this is what the eve of the 2,400th day feels like

Today would have been Jack's 55th birthday. Many years ago—I can't give you a specific number; grief is like that, almost like a magic trick, poof! taking things away while you aren't remembering to notice—I stopped pretending I had any idea what we'd be doing if he were still alive. In fact, I stopped allowing… Continue reading this is what the eve of the 2,400th day feels like