Sunday mornings J. goes to a meeting held at the hospital where he completed his last treatment, and this week — since it was his one-year anniversary and he was getting his coin there — he invited me to come along. While we were getting ready, he gave me a ring.
“This never belonged to any of my girlfriends,” he said. “I bought it about 20 years ago while traveling, and I’ve had it ever since. Now, it’s yours.”
It’s not anything fancy, but the ring took me by surprise and the gesture was genuine and quite sweet. A year ago, the thought of a relationship that lasted this long in which I still hadn’t had sex would have baffled me. This time around? I’m learning completely new things about what it means to open myself up and really let someone in — this must be what it’s like to have a healthy relationship, one based on the gradual development of trust and love rather than a dysfunctional one built upon fear, jealousy, dishonesty, and lust. Life is good today, and for that I am grateful. Namaste.