old (2007), Uncategorized

just a little thinkin’

Talking with A. at the faculty conference, the conversation turned to the question of how much, exactly, we should be able to depend upon our friends. I’ve been working on my brain tumor memoir lately, trying to find a frame of reference in which to place the story; it needs to be more interesting and original than a “I got sick and then got (somewhat) better” tale filled with both frustrations and joys. And then thinking about how disappointed R. was when more friends didn’t show up to her graduation party (including me), I’ve come to realize think that perhaps the whole point of the story I want to tell is a bigger existential one: even in times of crisis, even when we need people, and even when we are loved, we are still fundamentally alone… and it is in learning to both realize and cope with that fact that we achieve a real sense of autonomy as well as humanity.